Noooooooo! I'm not ready...

I read a couple of posts today from people describing their babies growing up and not being babies any more, these "not babies" were only 5-8 months older than Bryn... I'm so not ready for him to grow up! I've never enjoyed the "baby months" as much as I have with Bryn, he is so adorable (not that the other weren't, I was just in a "it's soooo much work" frame of mind, too much so to enjoy them like I do him :(...).

Bryn is definitely in the seperation anxiety stage now, he can't stand for me to be on the other side of the room and NOT holding him, even if Dad is showering him with affection and attention. With the other two, I really found this stage hard. With Bryn there are certainly times when I kinda wish he'd be happy with Dad, just for a little while longer, but I view his anxiety so differently this time. For some reason I can see the great love behind it, I can SEE that he is literally in love with me and just wants to be right by my side all the time, like the infatuation stage of a new relationship.

I feed him and glance down to find him staring at me, willing me to look at him, and then he breaks out in smiles because I do!

It's so amazing and deep, and I just don't know how I'm going to deal with it when he reaches that inevitable stage of his life where he will start to grow away from me, to form his own seperate identity (in just a few month, eeep!)...

Comments

Leah said…

*sniff sniff* :)

7:20 am

12 Things Happy People Do Differently - a self-reflection...

A few days ago a Facebook friend posted the above poster on her wall. I believe she got these points from this blog which she enjoys reading, and the bloggers on the Marc and Angel Hack Life blog derived their discussion of these points from this book, available on Amazon - you're welcome! I have to admit, I haven't read the blog or the book I've just mentioned but wanted my readers to have access to the sources of the poster for their own reflective purposes.
The New Year will be upon us in but a few days and I thought this a great opportunity to do a little personal assessment on how I'm playing the happy game. I'm often not very happy at all - I don't need to be happy all the time, let me just say that up front - I personally believe that life is a balancing act and those who seek euphoria often will also often feel desolation because in all things there must be balance. The great riches of the few on this planet come at the personal cost of the many as is …

The symbolism of elephants...

Just recently I've been seeing and noticing elephants everywhere!

A few weeks ago I saw the Samsung Elephant Ad, and watching that led me to watching a video with an elephant painting (seriously, you have to watch it to believe it!).

Then last night the boys told me they were having a free dress day at school to raise money for 'Mali the Elephant' - who turned out to be a paper maché statue which the children will paint and then show around the council before it comes back to the school to stand outside the performing arts room.

Then this morning I followed a link from Twitter to Toushka Lee's blog and read this post about an elephant orphanage in Sri Lanka.

This morning the Grumpy Old Man did another driving test and unfortunately didn't pass. We've booked his next test and are looking forward to that now. About ten minutes before he walked in the door I saw this poster on Facebook...

At the time, I didn't know if the Grumpy Old Man had been successful or …

Do you have low self-esteem?

I don't.

I used to think I did, but having met several people who really do have low self-esteem, I've now come to realise I actually have low confidence (and note I don't say low self-confidence, but more on that later), and that is a different breed of animal all together.

I was having a chat with a friend the other day about people who constantly put themselves down. If you are a participant in social media you might be aware of this kind of person. Everyone is smarter than them, prettier than them, more motivated, better organised, or has greater talent than them. It goes further, some of these people are not at all opposed to running themselves down to others with comments like, 'I'm so fat' (and not in a proud, fat acceptance way, but in a negative, self-loathing kind of way), or 'I'm stupid' or 'I'm ugly'.

Some people are just fishing for compliments, of course, but the ones who persist; the ones who simply cannot take a complimen…

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