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The weird and wonderful world of trying to conceive a girl...

WARNING: If you believe conceiving children should be left up to the gods, and should a romantic moment with a "let's just wait and see" attitude, you might not want to read on...

So, here I am in full swing LOAing my way to my daughter. I'm signed up with a-gender and have just recently discovered the In-gender forums. In there low-tech gender selection sub-forum I'm been learning all about the effects of diet on cm, as well as learning new terms like TBM, Spliming, why latex condoms are not good for collecting sperm, how lubricants such as Replens and Rephresh (which I don't believe are sold in Australia) can help to lower my cervical mucus pH, and how Dave's sperm pH needs to be down to 4.5 for calcium to bond to the Y chromosone sperm, immobilizing them...

So, let me explain a couple of new terms I've learned...

Swaying = Do various things to increase your likelihood of conceiving one gender over the other.

TBM = Turkey Baster Method, not unlike the teaspoon and the vegemite jar method, LOL, this is about collecting sperm in order to self-inseminate. Self-insemination raises the likelihood of conceiving a girl because you can control how far from the cervix the sperm is deposited, the farther away, the more likelihood of Y sperm not making the distance to the egg. TBMing and spliming exclusively (no actual sex which increases the woman's own cervical mucus making a welcoming environment for Y (male) sperm to swim up and meet the egg) is consdered the best way to sway for a girl.

TBM is usually done to accommodate Spliming...

Spliming = adding drops of lime to sperm in order to lower the sperm pH and immobilize the Y sperm. Sperm is collected, and then pH tested. Much sperm is between 7 and 9 pH, which is alkaline and a great environment for both X and Y sperm to live (about 50/50). By lowering the pH level, to at least 5.5, you reduce the ratio of X and Y sperm to around 70/30, respectively. Ideally, you need to lower the pH to 4.5, at which point you dramatically decrease the likelihood of Y sperm living.

O+12 = This is about introducing sperm to the cervix at about 12 hours after Ovulation occurs. This has strongly been link with increasing the likelihood of conceiving a girl.

Girl/Boy dates = this is the idea that certain dates each month are more prone to yield girl or boy conceptions, here is an example of this - I know a-gender uses some version of this, but I believe it more specific to each couple based on person biorhythmns or some such thing...

Girl/Boy diet = this is about making your body more alkaline (for a boy) or acid (for a girl)... This is an example of a girl diet I found...


GIRL DIET

DRINKS - high calcium milk must have 750ml min each day. Or high calcium water (acidic ph) bottled varieties - evian, perrier etc (thats it ladies - I am sorry)

MEAT - 130g per day only - more white than red

EGGS - ok in moderation

Unsalted butter

DAIRY - Yoghurt, milk desserts (2 x a day)+ milk as above

Bread - low/no salt variety (reduce yeast products)

Nuts - almonds, peanuts, hazel nuts, cashews all unsalted

FRUITS - apples, strawberries, rasberries

VEGES - Potatoes minimal (3 x week max) green beans, onions, leeks, peas, cucumber, radish, capsicum, celery, cooked tomato, eggplant, fresh asparagus, green salad

Jam - once per day

Rice, pasta, flour

Oils,spices, curry powders (no salt)

NONE OF THE FOLLOWING

Coffee, tea, chocolate, fruit juice, soft drinks, alcohol, pork, ham, ready to eat meals, smoked anything, sauces and gravy, shellfish, cheese (try nimbin low salt variety - this would be ok in small quantities), cakes (store bought) quiche, pizza, corn, popcorn, dry fruit, all other fruit than what is allowed, liquorice, olives, gherkins, tin or packet soup, alka seltzer or antacids...


Well, there you go! More than you ever wanted to know about conceiving a girl...

Comments

Leah said…
how fascinating, I have never heard of spliming! Are you gonna go to that extend?

I don't get the 0+12 thing tho? I thought you wanted old hardy girl sperm waiting when you O, is there some other thing at play there?
loz said…
Very interesting you now have me looking through those forums lol
kate said…
Very interesting reading... that food list makes me wonder how on earth Em was conceived I must admit!!

Will say though (in response to Leah LOL) that I only half *got it* when we were TTC Em, so delayed BDing until a day after I knew I had O'd because I thought it worked that way as well. Did in our case as it turns out LOL.
Amanda O. said…
Geeze, I never realized there was so much that could influence it! I have to say looking at the list of foods NOT to eat it's no wonder I had a boy!!! PMSL Other than shellfish and alcohol that encompasses many of Amanda's Favorite Foods/Ingredients!
Hey Sif, I tried to do the girl diet. Wasn't strict with it, but it seemed to work hey :-) LOL
Rebecca said…
Hi Sif

I can totally see why you want a girl after 3 boys. Even though for me I do believe you get what you get, I can also appreciate other peoples reasons for wanting one sex over the other, and I fully respect it.

I would like to know however, if you tried all of the above and you ended up with another boy, how you would feel and deal with this? This is a genuine question, I promise I am not trying to 'have a go', I am just wondering if you are at all prepared for having a boy baby!

Hope I havent offended, not my purpose in the slightest, I am just interested...
casso said…
No coffee? No tea even? Ok, we'll be here for you during this period Sif...hold your hand...talk you through the shakes...hold up photos of little vaginas to remind you why... HAHA! :o) It sounds pretty intense, good luck with it all.
Sif said…
Rebecca, I'm not at ALL offended :D! It's a very good question, in fact, and a fair one, especially to the child who will (hopefully) be a result of all this effort!

Here's my thing (and of course I can only speak for myself, other swayers will have to speak for themselves as I do not represent them)...

I have always, always wanted a large family. I come from large families and as a children was sorrounded by aunts and uncles who were close enough to me in age for me to consider them more like siblings (and them me, well the youngest ones anyway, hehehe)... So, I love having my three, but I often feel like someone (or two, never ruling out the possibility of twins) is missing. I daydream, especially, of the time when my children will be grown and being their own families to visit and the big family gatherings I experienced as a child.

Now, I've ALWAYS felt I'd have a daughter, and so I feel like my daughter is missing, and of course this is why I'm swaying this time around (seeing as the likelihood of ever convincing Dave to have number 5 (6?) is about as likely as me ever passing for a timid wallflower type...

The reasoning behind this all-out no-holes-barred attempt to increase our odds of conceiving a girl is so there will be NO REGRETS. I personally believe our children choose us before conception and so if a boy child wants to come to this family then he will (and Ari will be very welcomed!), but it will happen with me knowing I did everything *I* could do to help a girl child in, yk? If no girl eventuates I'll feel blessed for having has a son who so highly prized being in our family that he beat the odds to be bere!
HipbubbyMama said…
My brain hurts after reading that. And I'm with Kate, I think I broke all those "having a girl" rules. I guess it's dependent on so many factors hey.. I can totally understand why you want to give it your best shot. Rather you than me-no coffee, tea or chocolate would kill me LOL!!
Good Luck :)
Sif said…
That's the thing though. Some people can afford to break all the rules and they'll still have an even shot at a boy or a girl. And many people don't care (I find the women who care the most about what gender their child is, tend to be women without any daughters... Women without sons, not so much)...

I tend to believe I'm not one of those lucky people with an even chance of having either sex. I tend to think I'm rather alkaline. I have a lot of cervical mucus, and I orgasm without any effort whatsoever, both these things tend towards alkalinity. Alkalinity is great, lots of CM is great too, as is Oing at the drop of a hat, all signs of great health - unfortunately not great if you want a girl and tend to have a partner who produces a lot of male sperm, which I'm guessing Dave does, despite his age, his high body temperature, his love of dairy and disdain of boxer shorts, hahaha!
loz said…
I really like your explanation Sif as I completely agree with you. Recent months I have felt more and more content with my boys and if this is how things will be then I will cherish them just like I would anyway. If another baby should be out there waiting for us then I too would like them to be a girl but at the end of the day I want another child in our family so I would love a boy just as much and look forward to DIL's lol..

DH's family have a long history of boys, sil is the first girl in 5 generations so the odds of letting nature take its course aren't in our favour if we want a girl even MIL said they did everything at the time to conceive sil!!
Do you have ay links for working out alkalinity or acidicness? I am really curious about that.
shae said…
Supposedly hotter sperm make girls as well- hence my hubby is a welder and 2 girls lol. Luke reckons most of the kids of guys he has worked with have girls too.-tight undies and jeans for Dave maybe??
Sif said…
That's what I was saying, Shae, Dave's average body temperature is quite high, he's a "hot" sort of person! And he wears tight undies (as in jocks not boxers), but not jeans... Competitive male swimmers tend to produce daughters, too! Not that Dave is a competitive swimmer, LOL.

Laura, you can by pH strips on ebay to test your alkalinity with...

Try these: http://cgi.ebay.com.au/ALKALIVE-PH-STIX-STRIPS-PAPER-FOR-URINE-AND-SALIVA_W0QQitemZ190145319487QQihZ009QQcategoryZ11780QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

It is best to test urine and yours and Dh's mucus (his sperm)... Have fun!
Rebecca said…
Thanks for explaining Sif. Glad I didn't offend.

I also always wanted a big family, I used to see adult siblings visiting their families here for Christmas and just wanted that for me and my kids. I look at families with a boy and a girl and feel like it's so boring (for me and my feelings, I have one older brother so maybe that's why). As a teen I would dream of having a tribe of at least 6, looking forward to the chaotic atmosphere. Now with my little ones so close in age, I might have to put that on hold! Don't know if I'm cut out for the chaos of more just yet!

And actually now that you mention it, when I was pregnant with DD#1, I wanted a girl so, so badly. I was worried at the time if I had a boy, all my kids would be boys and I'd never get the daughter I so craved. I think as women we all crave a daughter? So I do understand you more a bit better now.

To be honest, I know we will have another baby, and I am so sure it will be a girl. I think I have one more left in me lol!
loz said…
Haha not sure DH would be umm happy with that lol I can see the look on his face now ROFL

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