Skip to main content

That happy, happy feeling...

It's so fleeting isn't it? Like the tide, you know it'll come and go, but you can't really control it.

Being empathic, I have issues with taking on other people's emotions. I've really got to work on cutting those attachments. Letting other people have their emotions, without assimilating them into myself.

I often have that "everything is going to be great!" feeling. I had it when I finished my last blog. Wouldn't it be wonderful if everyone felt like that about life? Then I think I could savour the feeling for longer when it washed over me, LOL.

I hate struggling over other people's emotions. Worrying about how other people feel, especially how others feel about me and my choices. LOL, I always have so much faith in my own decisions! Over confidence maybe, but somehow I can't seem to translate that faith in a way that others are filled with it as well.

WRT to this birth. I've had some feelings about just having the baby without anyone around. I'm certainly not a freebirth advocate, and ideally I'd love to have the company and support of my husband and a qualified midwife (and of course my doula), but I only want people who are fully confident in my ability to birth at home at my birth. I don't want anyone who arrives at the scene with contingency plans in the back of their mind, yk?

I really believe this birth will be as straight forward as Luey and Bryn's were. I "feel it in my bones", and this is what has me thinking, do I really need to be inviting people in who might not share that feeling?

Oh well, it's month away, plenty of time to really weigh up everyone's attitude :).

Comments

Stitch Sista said…
I hear you!

After M's birth, and really wanting to be alone through the bulk of the labour, I realised this time around that I could almost do it alone...I mean a part of me would like to be left to my own devices in much the same way a cat slinks off to give birth in private...

Not (consciously) for that same reasons you've mentioned, but it certainly appeals to me. It's hard to discern whether it's my own niggles that stop me, or worrying about DH and what he would make of that...

Good luck coming to a decision that is right for you! I've really come to feel that where/how a birth takes place should be left solely up to the birthing woman. That would be deemed selfish to some, but it's so very personal and intimate to me. FFS it's MY body doing it yk...so I have to be in the best headspace possible to get the best result - no matter how it makes someone else feel.

Popular posts from this blog

12 Things Happy People Do Differently - a self-reflection...

A few days ago a Facebook friend posted the above poster on her wall. I believe she got these points from this blog which she enjoys reading, and the bloggers on the Marc and Angel Hack Life blog derived their discussion of these points from this book, available on Amazon - you're welcome! I have to admit, I haven't read the blog or the book I've just mentioned but wanted my readers to have access to the sources of the poster for their own reflective purposes.
The New Year will be upon us in but a few days and I thought this a great opportunity to do a little personal assessment on how I'm playing the happy game. I'm often not very happy at all - I don't need to be happy all the time, let me just say that up front - I personally believe that life is a balancing act and those who seek euphoria often will also often feel desolation because in all things there must be balance. The great riches of the few on this planet come at the personal cost of the many as is …

The symbolism of elephants...

Just recently I've been seeing and noticing elephants everywhere!

A few weeks ago I saw the Samsung Elephant Ad, and watching that led me to watching a video with an elephant painting (seriously, you have to watch it to believe it!).

Then last night the boys told me they were having a free dress day at school to raise money for 'Mali the Elephant' - who turned out to be a paper maché statue which the children will paint and then show around the council before it comes back to the school to stand outside the performing arts room.

Then this morning I followed a link from Twitter to Toushka Lee's blog and read this post about an elephant orphanage in Sri Lanka.

This morning the Grumpy Old Man did another driving test and unfortunately didn't pass. We've booked his next test and are looking forward to that now. About ten minutes before he walked in the door I saw this poster on Facebook...


At the time, I didn't know if the Grumpy Old Man had been successful or …

Alone... And Stuff...

Do you ever just need to be alone?



As the boys are growing up, we have more times when the house is quiet. The youngest will be asleep. One will be reading, one will be playing on his computer with headphones on, one will be painting and there is stillness.

Sometimes, even that is not enough.

Sometimes I crave being alone, with no possibility of someone suddenly realising they have to tell me something important or ask me a question or even just crash about in the kitchen.

Sometimes I crave S P A C E, lots and lots of space, being able to walk from room to room without encountering another soul.

This is how I felt when I woke up this morning, so instead of getting ready for work, I decided to stay home. Get up, but not go anywhere, no hear the sound of my own voice, or anyone else's.

I think this might just be part of getting older. After a lifetime of chasing after other people and trying not to be alone, my mind and body is full of thoughts, experiences, feelings, and busy-ness …