Skip to main content

It's hot tonight...

I should be asleep, but it's hot tonight, our first hot night of the season!

Without looking I know my ticker has ticked over to 4 days left.

Imagine that!

It's funny, I feel like I should be more excited, rofl. But I'm feeling very relaxed about it all of a sudden. As another wise pg woman said yesterday, there seems to be a change in the air. Maybe it's the impending full moon! The celestial sign of all things ripening to their fullest potential... That knowledge that this baby will be here soon, no matter what...

I still catch myself feeling like that will happen to someone else, not me. That I'm waiting for someone else to have a baby, not waiting on my own labour to start. I catch my breath when I think about the fact that it's actually ME who will be going into labour, and giving birth... It just doesn't seem real, rofl. It certainly doesn't seem like something that could happen any time, even though time is running down at a rate of knots now...

Intellectually, I'm anxious to have this baby soon. There are a number of things that would be made a fair bit easier if the baby arrived in the next couple of days or so...

Emotionally though, I'm not in a rush just yet. I haven't got that "over it" feeling, and in some ways, I might not even be ready to meet this little person yet. I still have some Bryn to savour. I still feel like I have to "wake up" to this new person as more than just something I've hoped for for a few years now. Oh, and then there is my new found trepidation about labouring. Goodness knows why I'm not as "chafing at the bit" to get into it all this time. Usually at this point, I'm like a marathon runner 10 minutes before the race starts, focused, hungry, and excited all at once. This time, I'm not so sure, this time I think it might be a bit of hard work, LOL.

I realise I shouldn't be LOAing that stuff, hahaha, but hey, I've just got to go with what I'm feeling.

All I know is, I have the knowledge that there are things I could do to get this going, and I don't want to do them...

Even going as far as having the inkling that maybe if I finally washeed those baby clothes and wraps, this baby might decide to come, and yet each morning I find some new reason to put that job off, hahaha! Like some sort of supersticious laundry is the kep to going into labour, PMSL...

Well, maybe I should go lie down, even if I don't sleep...

Comments

Stitch Sista said…
Gosh Sif you are taking me back 3 months. I just realised from your post that I only just washed the baby clothes hours before N came. Infact I had them in the dryer until right up when she was born. Fancy that LOL!

Popular posts from this blog

12 Things Happy People Do Differently - a self-reflection...

A few days ago a Facebook friend posted the above poster on her wall. I believe she got these points from this blog which she enjoys reading, and the bloggers on the Marc and Angel Hack Life blog derived their discussion of these points from this book, available on Amazon - you're welcome! I have to admit, I haven't read the blog or the book I've just mentioned but wanted my readers to have access to the sources of the poster for their own reflective purposes.
The New Year will be upon us in but a few days and I thought this a great opportunity to do a little personal assessment on how I'm playing the happy game. I'm often not very happy at all - I don't need to be happy all the time, let me just say that up front - I personally believe that life is a balancing act and those who seek euphoria often will also often feel desolation because in all things there must be balance. The great riches of the few on this planet come at the personal cost of the many as is …

The symbolism of elephants...

Just recently I've been seeing and noticing elephants everywhere!

A few weeks ago I saw the Samsung Elephant Ad, and watching that led me to watching a video with an elephant painting (seriously, you have to watch it to believe it!).

Then last night the boys told me they were having a free dress day at school to raise money for 'Mali the Elephant' - who turned out to be a paper maché statue which the children will paint and then show around the council before it comes back to the school to stand outside the performing arts room.

Then this morning I followed a link from Twitter to Toushka Lee's blog and read this post about an elephant orphanage in Sri Lanka.

This morning the Grumpy Old Man did another driving test and unfortunately didn't pass. We've booked his next test and are looking forward to that now. About ten minutes before he walked in the door I saw this poster on Facebook...


At the time, I didn't know if the Grumpy Old Man had been successful or …

Alone... And Stuff...

Do you ever just need to be alone?



As the boys are growing up, we have more times when the house is quiet. The youngest will be asleep. One will be reading, one will be playing on his computer with headphones on, one will be painting and there is stillness.

Sometimes, even that is not enough.

Sometimes I crave being alone, with no possibility of someone suddenly realising they have to tell me something important or ask me a question or even just crash about in the kitchen.

Sometimes I crave S P A C E, lots and lots of space, being able to walk from room to room without encountering another soul.

This is how I felt when I woke up this morning, so instead of getting ready for work, I decided to stay home. Get up, but not go anywhere, no hear the sound of my own voice, or anyone else's.

I think this might just be part of getting older. After a lifetime of chasing after other people and trying not to be alone, my mind and body is full of thoughts, experiences, feelings, and busy-ness …