So, it occurred to me this morning, as I sat here playing Bejewelled, knowing it's just a complete waste of time, and yet not being able to motivate myself to do much else (though, of course, the care an maintainence of the youngest child did get a look-in)... Hmmm, what was I saying? Oh, yeah, so it occurred to me that success - achievement - is well and truly within grasp for me, but for some reason I resist grasping it.
I know EXACTLY what it would take to achieve the things I would like to achieve. The effort of achieving would not be disproportionate to the contentment I'd feel once I've achieved, and yet I can't seem to just do what needs to be done.
There are three goals I'm thinking of specifically, here.
Saving money is really just a matter of not spending money on stuff we don't need - in fact, I spend a lot of money on junk food, chips and chocolate and so on to munch on at night while I procrastinate from finishing my degree. If I didn't spend money on things I really don't need, I'd be able to save a decent amount of money.
Becoming healthy really isn't that hard. I know EXACTLY what it take to achieve this. I've managed to do it several times before (though my committment to eating nutritionally rich food and to exercising never stuck). Not sitting around munching on crap at night would also help me achieve my goal of finishing my degree and saving money...
So, why don't I want to succeed? If success is so easy to achieve, why don't I just do what is needed? What am I afraid of?
I know EXACTLY what it would take to achieve the things I would like to achieve. The effort of achieving would not be disproportionate to the contentment I'd feel once I've achieved, and yet I can't seem to just do what needs to be done.
There are three goals I'm thinking of specifically, here.
- Finishing my Masters degree
- Saving money
- Becoming healthy (fit and a healthy weight/size)
Saving money is really just a matter of not spending money on stuff we don't need - in fact, I spend a lot of money on junk food, chips and chocolate and so on to munch on at night while I procrastinate from finishing my degree. If I didn't spend money on things I really don't need, I'd be able to save a decent amount of money.
Becoming healthy really isn't that hard. I know EXACTLY what it take to achieve this. I've managed to do it several times before (though my committment to eating nutritionally rich food and to exercising never stuck). Not sitting around munching on crap at night would also help me achieve my goal of finishing my degree and saving money...
So, why don't I want to succeed? If success is so easy to achieve, why don't I just do what is needed? What am I afraid of?
Comments
I am my own worst enemy.
We all fear success. Where will it take us? What other changes will we want to make to our lives if we are successful?
I'm a little concerned I might just be taking it all for granted. Maybe if someone said to me, you'll die without that finishing that Masters degree and you'll die because you took living for granted, and what's more you'll die in poverty... Maybe then I'd sprout some motivation?
Or not...
*sigh* when you find the answers, let me know.