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Showing posts from April, 2010

Knowing your own worth...

I used to think I had really poor self-esteem. Now I'm not so sure. I heard some words come out of one of my children's mouth today that shocked me to my core. He said, "So, anyway I suck at math..."

"What???" I asked incrediously, "Why do you say that?"

"Because, today, I didn't know what division was."

"But you know what division is, you've been doing division since before you even started school!"

"Oh, I know," he said, "but I didn't know what the word meant."

"So, you didn't know what a word meant, but how does that mean you suck at math?" I asked.

"Because I didn't know what it meant!" he replied, his face forming one big DUH!

I told him not knowing something did NOT make him suck, and what's more I never wanted to hear him say something like that about himself. I told him he needed to know his worth. He wanted to know what I meant. I explain that there is a L…

How would you like people to remember you after you've passed, if at all?

This is a serious question. I've posed it elsewhere but am not really expecting many serious responses, so in anticipation of that result, I'm posting it here as well.

How would you like to be remember. What traits do you want to be remembered for, what accomplishments?

Maybe you don't care if or how you are remembered, why don't you care?

I'm not really career minded...

So, this year I've been studying a Certificate III in Children's Services and, ahem (ok, more like neglecting) a Master of Arts (Creative Writing). The two courses are so poles apart in most every aspect that I've struggled to focus fully on either course. Because the Certificate ends first and is a much shorter course - oh, and because I have to go into class every week and face my teacher - I've been more focused on that course. The Masters has always been at the back of my mind and I've longed to have the mental and physical energy to tackle that course as well.

In recent weeks I've felt quite fired up by the issues sorrounding the state of childcare in Australia, and wanting to be able to make a difference - especially to children's individual experiences. However, this has also been an extremely emotional process for me. I've felt quite helpless at times and depressed as well.

Truth be told, I'm not sure I could work in Children's Servic…

Orvil J. Pithy...

I know I recently posted about objectifying children in blog posts, but I also said I was likely to continue doing this to my own children, despite my misgivings. So, here's one of those blogs...

Bryn has been so cute lately, and I just had to share...

The other day he went grocery shopping for Nanna with Dave. It was a dark, cloudy day and sure enough just as they were coming home, the heavens opened. At first, Bryn, who was only wearing a hoodie because it hadn't been particularly cold, huddled up again Dave's leg sheltering beneath the hood of his jacket with his brave face on.

After a few minutes though the hardcore deluge started to get the better of him and he moaned at Dave, "It getting very wet NOW. This is the wettest day of my LIFE!"

Another story...

Just recently, Bryn's kinder teacher gently suggested we might want to take him to a speech therapist. We've decided to take the wait and see approach as Bryn's speech is certainly muddled at ti…

The vaccination debate...

PUBLIC SERVICE WARNING: If you believe in vaccinations and you'd rather not be infuriated, this is your opportunity to close the window and find something more valuable to do with your time :).

It's been a huge week in this household for the vaccination debate.

Ari is about to turn 18 months and so I had to go and get his Conscientious Objector form filled in by my Maternal and Child Health Nurse. Our MCHN is very respectful of our choices and while she had to double check that we'd done our research - because you know, only COs are required to research their decision, because it's immediately presumed wrong - she was not going to sit in judge of our choice as so many other had.

Our reasoning is a combination of factors:

Erik and Luey both suffered with very bad allergies, which are ongoing for them, and when we took Luey to a specialist Paediatrician at a couple of months of age, that Paed suggested we hold off on vaccination for him because it might be triggering his se…

The objectification of children on blogs...

Was reading a friend's blog this morning about the difficulty of posting about older children on blogs.

I find it increasingly difficult to blog about my children as they become older and when I stop to thing about it, I realise, for me it's about the objectification of children. Quite often I read blog posts by proud parents going on and on and on about how clever their child is. I've even read blog by people who don't believe in praising children, which are one long praise of a child's advanced and eccentric ways.

Parents, almost universally, though I do know a few exceptions, have a deep seeded need to share with others how amazing and wonderous their children are to them.

It's a commonly held belief that through the eyes of a child, a grown (and often jaded) adult can see the world anew, I know I've experienced this first hand.

So, wanting to post about one's children is completely understandable and my own blog is bursting at the seams with such post…

Taking a minute while the potatos roast...

Nothing much has changed since my last post, and yet I do manage to feel a bit lighter about it all...

I was dreading going to work last Friday, like, REALLY dreading it. I dropped Bryn off at kindergarten and from there I walked the 10 minutes to work. Almost every single step was a struggle not to just turn around and go back to the bus stop, go home and tell Dave I'm quitting the course, the work, everything and we can all just starve or something.

But I kept plodding along the footpath until eventually I was keying in the code to the main door and letting myself in.

Honestly, once in the door, I felt differently. I feel happy and excited. I really do love the work! I left a few short hours later (was 6 hours, but felt shorter) feeling very positive about the whole childcare course and doing work and all that jazz.

Had a nice, though extremely busy weekend. Didn't get any study done that I'd planned to do, but did take the big boys to the optometrist and grocery shopp…

Burnout - it may be genetic...

I'm struggling this morning.

The overwhelming feeling I have is to want to quit. Generally speaking, I'm not a quitter, but therein lies my issue, you see. I love starting stuff - that's another issue I have, by the way - but I'm not a fan of quitting if I start too much at once. This is why I'm fairly familiar with that feeling I'm having right now. That faint smell of smouldering around the edges. I've taken on too much. My enthusiasm for all I've taken on has waned. I'm suffering the first signs of burnout.

I'm thinking this may be genetic. I've watched my mum go through this a few times. The "can-do" spirit is strong in both of us. The inability to let go is also very strong. So, the pattern goes something like this;

Oh wow, that looks really INTERESTING, or alternatively, something needs to be done about THAT! I'll do it! Sure, I'm already doing four other things, but hey, I'm superwoman, I can do it all!…

My shopping list...

Over the past few weeks I've had a running shopping list in my head. It's been a long while since I've been able to make plans to buy anything, so it's a bit of an old habit, and I have to keep reminding myself that it'll be a while yet before I can go shopping...

Anyway, to satisfy my consumer-bone, I thought I'd post about the things currently on my list...

In no particular order...

A table and chairs or stools for the kitchen: our kitchen isn't big enough to seat all of us, but it would be nice to have a small table just for setting out breakfast, or for a cuppa with a friend. I was thinking of something like the following from Ikea...



maybe with these stools under it...



A large picture for over the mantel in the bedroom: This might be a large canvas that I paint myself because I want something bright and cheerful and abstract...

A set of shelves for the bathroom: like this...



Full length mirror for my bedroom: like this...



A rug for my side of the bed: like…

Pink notices and Teddy Bear visits...

We always know when it's term again. It never takes long for the boys to bring home a pink notice from school. Pink notices, we are told by the school newsletter, are for very important information that requires prompt reply from the parents. Pink notices, we have discovered, actually require a response that involves us sending money to the school for one thing or another.

Hardly a week goes by without a pink notice (or 2 or 3!). There is always one in the first week, and often - like today - one on the very first day of school. The school tells us this is what they call school community participation. It is our way to express our appreciation for, and support of, our school.

Today's pink notice was for ANZAC Day festivities in the form of ANZAC biscuits and a cup of tea, followed by a sausage sizzle (each sausage will cost $2 - I'm pretty sure I can buy 1.5 dozen for $10, so they're going to make a killing on those sausages - pun fully intended).

Kindergarten doesn…

End of days...

Holidays that is.

It used to be that I dreaded holidays. Even before the boys started school. Everything feels different during the holidays. Public transport and public places certainly change, that's for sure. Before the boys started school, holidays meant no more peaceful outings for a while, because every family would be at the popular children's venues (homeschoolers really DO appreciate having those venues to themselves during term, LOL, you have NO IDEA how much nicer it is!)...

Then when the boys did start school, the holidays became this pressure cooker of togetherness where there was somehow an expectation of something special or exciting on the schedule each day (even though we had done NOTHING to create that expectation - except send them to school with children who's parents did lots to create that expectation in their own kids, who then shared that expectation with their friends, in an almost competitive manner, at times)...

I think, mostly, the holidays wer…

Just when you've cleared one hurdle...

So, for a month we've lived with the saga of the broken cold water in the shower and washing machine drainage pipe and electrical outlet in the laundry. The cold water pipe was finally replace on Thursday - Ah, a good shower fixes most things!!! The laundry washer drainage pipe was fixed at the same time. Then this morning the electrician came and fixed the faulty switch in the laundry so we were finally able to set the washing machine up in it's rightful position and plug it in without extension cords and EVERYTHING!

So, that what we did and the bloody washing machine DIED. It's been leaking water since we moved, but now it won't fill the washing machine at all.

DAMN IT!

I can't even tell you how tight money is atm... It's so tight, it's actually turning inside out. We're *just* managing (with much calling around on my part) to keep debt collectors from the door. We were supposed to repay MIL some of the money she loaned us for the move from the …

Inspired to challenge myself...

Was reading a friend's (StitchSista) blog where she'd given herself a set of challenges to achieve during a week and then come back to review her progress a week later, and found it inspiring - especially as recently I've really fallen into a hole when it comes to requiring much from myself.

So, I thought I'd do something similar... As it's currently the middle of the week, and I like things in a neat and orderly fashion - AND I'm thinking baby steps might be in order, just to ease myself back into things - I'm going to set myself goals to reach by Sunday night, in preparation for the new term starting on Monday...

Have breakfast by 10am each day and make it fruit!Drink 8 glasses of water each day.Submit a chapter of my manuscript to Moodle.Write that Cert. III essay on Bronfenbrenner.Take the boys to the movies (to see How to Train Your Dragon - courtesy of Nanna Bird).Sort and clean the laundry and post before and after pics here!I think that's enough…

Hanging onto the past...

Just scanning my blog and saw my blog profile picture and had to have a chuckle at myself. It's not really an "old" picture, I think it was taken maybe a year ago or so, but oh my, it's really not a true reflection of me now... I feel like I've aged so much since that photo was taken, and goodness knows I've packed on a few pounds (ok, a few stone, but let's not be too pedantic at this hour)...

Funny how we hang onto romantic notions of ourselves as a form of self-preservation.

Easter Sunday 2010

The very first thing I want to say in this blog is that this Easter Sunday has been DELIGHTFUL! No pestering from the kids to get eggs, no screaming hyped kids on sugar, no need for us olds to get cross or take away chocolate, none of the usual Easter Sunday trials and tribulations that usually leave Dave and I wondering why we bother... Something is very, very different this year, and yet, we haven't done anything differently... It's just been so wonderfully relaxed and enjoyable and yet exciting for us all with lots of yelps of glee and smiley faces (the way I always imagined Easter would be with my kids). For that I'm feeling very, very blessed today!

So, here are a few (ok, a lot, but you know what I'm like around a camera) photos of our day so far...

The boys were all so patient this morning. They got up, watched morning cartoons, had Sultana Bran and let me have s sleep in until nearly 10am!!! Then I got up, had a coffee and went to check if the Easter Bunny …