Skip to main content

It's not good... (This is not an Election 2010 post)

It's not good when...

  • The Sun is actually shining and I still feel bad (the presence of the Sun always lifts my spirits, if it doesn't, that's not a good sign).
  • It's the 22nd of August and I need to have my 2nd draft finished by the 1st of September. (I should mention I've written 11 000 of 40 000 word so far)
  • I feel like I can only manage one thing at a time, and yet four million things seem to need doing RIGHT NOW!
  • The boxes are still out on the back patio a week after I asked them to be removed to the garage.
  • The house seems to fall into a distressing state if I don't clean it myself or nag others to do it.
  • The fridge needs to be cleaned or I swear it might walk out of here by itself.
  • These things seem to be playing on my mind MORE than my thesis.
  • It's so cold, even with the sun out, it's still soooo cold!
  • I want to crawl into bed and stay there.
I need to break this cycle.  I think I need to give myself permission to do whatever it takes until the middle of October to get this thesis done and submitted.  Graduating next Autumn is my greatest priority.  It's more important than a clean and tidy house, it really is.  I've spent far too long on this degree already.  There is a PhD with my name on it out there!  I want to get started on that PhD.  I saw someone else's transcript of qualifications today and she had done the same degree as me a few years ago, she'd now in the middle of her PhD...  I feel so far behind!  (Yes, I know that sounds ridiculous, I don't care!  This is my blog-tantrum!  Wah!)

Ok, time to suck it up!


Cate P said…
Everything is more important than a clean and tidy house ... that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it;)
Good luck, get writing.

Popular posts from this blog

The symbolism of elephants...

Just recently I've been seeing and noticing elephants everywhere!

A few weeks ago I saw the Samsung Elephant Ad, and watching that led me to watching a video with an elephant painting (seriously, you have to watch it to believe it!).

Then last night the boys told me they were having a free dress day at school to raise money for 'Mali the Elephant' - who turned out to be a paper maché statue which the children will paint and then show around the council before it comes back to the school to stand outside the performing arts room.

Then this morning I followed a link from Twitter to Toushka Lee's blog and read this post about an elephant orphanage in Sri Lanka.

This morning the Grumpy Old Man did another driving test and unfortunately didn't pass. We've booked his next test and are looking forward to that now. About ten minutes before he walked in the door I saw this poster on Facebook...

At the time, I didn't know if the Grumpy Old Man had been successful or …

Alone... And Stuff...

Do you ever just need to be alone?

As the boys are growing up, we have more times when the house is quiet. The youngest will be asleep. One will be reading, one will be playing on his computer with headphones on, one will be painting and there is stillness.

Sometimes, even that is not enough.

Sometimes I crave being alone, with no possibility of someone suddenly realising they have to tell me something important or ask me a question or even just crash about in the kitchen.

Sometimes I crave S P A C E, lots and lots of space, being able to walk from room to room without encountering another soul.

This is how I felt when I woke up this morning, so instead of getting ready for work, I decided to stay home. Get up, but not go anywhere, no hear the sound of my own voice, or anyone else's.

I think this might just be part of getting older. After a lifetime of chasing after other people and trying not to be alone, my mind and body is full of thoughts, experiences, feelings, and busy-ness …

12 Things Happy People Do Differently - a self-reflection...

A few days ago a Facebook friend posted the above poster on her wall. I believe she got these points from this blog which she enjoys reading, and the bloggers on the Marc and Angel Hack Life blog derived their discussion of these points from this book, available on Amazon - you're welcome! I have to admit, I haven't read the blog or the book I've just mentioned but wanted my readers to have access to the sources of the poster for their own reflective purposes.
The New Year will be upon us in but a few days and I thought this a great opportunity to do a little personal assessment on how I'm playing the happy game. I'm often not very happy at all - I don't need to be happy all the time, let me just say that up front - I personally believe that life is a balancing act and those who seek euphoria often will also often feel desolation because in all things there must be balance. The great riches of the few on this planet come at the personal cost of the many as is …