Skip to main content

The bug that bit me...

I was just asked by Jen at Jemikaan which bug bit me to make me start doing all the walking I've done in the past week.

The quick answer is that I've always loved walking - I'm a Sagittarius and we're well known for our love of movement and particularly for our muscular legs (don't everyone fall over laughing at once, I have muscles in my legs, they're just well camouflaged so other people don't feel intimidated by my great sporting physique).

However, it is true that I haven't had this level of walking lust for a while, probably for about five years actually. Back in 2006 I went on quite the walking bender, and walked many kilometers every day - I lost about 32kg that year, too! In the intervening five years I've been less inclined to walk and have put all that weight back on (plus an extra 3kg, of course, because that's the law - google it and you will see!).

Mind you, I've also been pretty busy in the last four years. I found myself all caught up in baby lust in 2007, and late that year I also started the Masters I've just graduated from. I love studying as much as I love walking, but let's face it, studying is draining, maybe not physically, but emotionally and mentally and I found it hard to "get out and walk".

Then I fell pregnant, and I have to admit, I kind of thought I didn't need to walk then. You see, in my first three pregnancies I lost weight, so I thought I'd just sit back and gestate and lose weight. Murphy had other plans and for the first time ever, I gained weight, not much, but some.

After Ari was born, I was quite sick for a few months, so didn't walk then - I tried odd bits here and there, but I just wasn't feeling it.

Then I started to stress out about my studies, and about trying to get a job, and so on, and all that stress meant that walking looked like a burden rather than a release.

This year, this last week, something has changed, and the change has been so drastic that I have had people comment. I've gone from not wanting to move at all to walking at least 6km a day. Six kilometers isn't that hard for me, really. As I said, I think I'm innately physical, even though the lazy is strong within me! I'm an endurance, uh, what's the word I'm looking for here - not athlete - person? I'm not fast, but I have the mental capacity to "just keep going" even though it feels hard in the moment. In fact, I thrive on the challenge. And that there also explains why I'm walking right now...

I have no other challenge in my life. My baby sleeps at night - all night! I'm not studying. I'm not working. I am trying to do some writing, but writing is like breathing for me, I have to do it. So, as soon as I graduated and returned home last week, I realised I had this great open vastness of nothing in front of me. I do have to prepare for my PhD next year and I do have a toddler at home, but those things aren't enough of a challenge.

Walking pretty much keeps me from going completely insane from boredom, I think. It provides a challenge, a goal, an outlet for my frenetic energy. As Dave said to me last week, "This is when you're dangerous, before you find a new focus, when you might decide to focus on me and make my life miserable!" I'm a driven person who needs a focus or I become unbearable to live with!

The bug that bit me was the "I need a goal' bug.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

12 Things Happy People Do Differently - a self-reflection...

A few days ago a Facebook friend posted the above poster on her wall. I believe she got these points from this blog which she enjoys reading, and the bloggers on the Marc and Angel Hack Life blog derived their discussion of these points from this book, available on Amazon - you're welcome! I have to admit, I haven't read the blog or the book I've just mentioned but wanted my readers to have access to the sources of the poster for their own reflective purposes.
The New Year will be upon us in but a few days and I thought this a great opportunity to do a little personal assessment on how I'm playing the happy game. I'm often not very happy at all - I don't need to be happy all the time, let me just say that up front - I personally believe that life is a balancing act and those who seek euphoria often will also often feel desolation because in all things there must be balance. The great riches of the few on this planet come at the personal cost of the many as is …

The symbolism of elephants...

Just recently I've been seeing and noticing elephants everywhere!

A few weeks ago I saw the Samsung Elephant Ad, and watching that led me to watching a video with an elephant painting (seriously, you have to watch it to believe it!).

Then last night the boys told me they were having a free dress day at school to raise money for 'Mali the Elephant' - who turned out to be a paper maché statue which the children will paint and then show around the council before it comes back to the school to stand outside the performing arts room.

Then this morning I followed a link from Twitter to Toushka Lee's blog and read this post about an elephant orphanage in Sri Lanka.

This morning the Grumpy Old Man did another driving test and unfortunately didn't pass. We've booked his next test and are looking forward to that now. About ten minutes before he walked in the door I saw this poster on Facebook...


At the time, I didn't know if the Grumpy Old Man had been successful or …

Alone... And Stuff...

Do you ever just need to be alone?



As the boys are growing up, we have more times when the house is quiet. The youngest will be asleep. One will be reading, one will be playing on his computer with headphones on, one will be painting and there is stillness.

Sometimes, even that is not enough.

Sometimes I crave being alone, with no possibility of someone suddenly realising they have to tell me something important or ask me a question or even just crash about in the kitchen.

Sometimes I crave S P A C E, lots and lots of space, being able to walk from room to room without encountering another soul.

This is how I felt when I woke up this morning, so instead of getting ready for work, I decided to stay home. Get up, but not go anywhere, no hear the sound of my own voice, or anyone else's.

I think this might just be part of getting older. After a lifetime of chasing after other people and trying not to be alone, my mind and body is full of thoughts, experiences, feelings, and busy-ness …