I didn't do a 10 Things link-up last week, anyone miss me? I could so easily fall into the trap of just letting it slide, this is my way... I start all enthusiastic and then I peter out. Might be an ADHD thing, might just be a Sif thing - or maybe those things are the same thing. The depths of my soul are all black and gungey like those horrid tar filled lungs on anti-smoking ad campaigns. Every time I open my mouth I cough up a huge sticky black piece of self-pity laidened crap. I have my moments of joy, they're just struggling to be noticed at the moment, poor wee things. So, in the absence of any kind of wonderful inspiration, I present to you a list of 10 things that are really pissing me off right now. Enjoy!
#1 ~ Judging a person on knowing one thing about them. Not all people who are in possession of Minecraft suffer an absence of 'a life' (even sadder that this judgement came out of the mouth of a nine year old - judgement starts so early these days). The same goes for blogging, keeping a clean house, being a parent, and so much more! No interest or passtime is incompatible with 'having a life'. Even people who spend a lot of energy assessing other people's possession of 'a life' probably also have 'a life' - probably.
#2 ~ If someone mentions that they have a problem, but they don't proceed to ask you how they might solve their problem, chances are you aren't doing them any favours by trying to solve their problem for them no matter how well meant your advice is. Chances are - if it is a long standing problem, there isn't a solution they haven't considered or attempted themselves already. Chances are, if they reject all you suggestions it is not because they don't want to solve their problem but because they've already considered your suggestions, weighed them up carefully and found they wouldn't improve their unique situation. Chances are they just wanted someone to listen and sympathise. Don't offer unsolicited advice, it puts all sorts of pressure on the person you think you're helping.
#3 ~ People who claim to have the greater interest of everyone at heart, when actually patronising those around them and blatantly protecting their own interests while pretending their shit smells like roses. The Emperor has no clothes!
#4 ~ Kids will be kids and forwarding all email correspondence in my children's email accounts to my inbox will mean occassionally reading stuff which rubs me the wrong way but 'Dear smart-arse friend of my child, the correct response to being sent an email Christmas card is not sarcasm, it is 'Thank You!' I know your mum would agree.'
#5 ~ While it is easier to be surrounded by people for whom life is all sunshine and lollipops, this is not realistic. Sometimes people's lives suck and everything inside their head is ugly and twitching with dark loathsomeness. Sometimes people live with this darkness on a daily basis and battling to keep the clouds from crashing above their heads takes every ounce of their energy and there isn't anything left for looking for silver linings or finding joy in small blessings. Sometimes just not falling apart is the blessing. Don't blame these people for the suck-factor of their lives, they don't need you pious self-congratulation. These people can't just 'get over it'. These people aren't likely to feel a lot better overnight. What often helps though is when other people get that. When the 'Perpetual Sad Sack' is allowed to get things out of their head and off their chest - which often helps the darkness disappate as well. No, it's not comfortable watching and listening to someone suffer - suffering of the mind is hardest because it is so intangible - but attempting to stifle such a person is cruel and heartless and only prolongs suffering. The suffering is not pretty, but it is real.
#6 ~ People with no experience who are experts.
#7 ~ Being psychic, but only seeing how things can get much worse without action, and being powerless to act.
#8 ~ Turning forty without a party - it's not going to happen, it can't be justified and I just want to throw a huge tanty about it... Man, it's so happening when I turn fifty!
#9 ~ My own inability to make myself write for NaNoWriMo. I've been so distracted and overwhelmed by the relentlessness of life that I find myself constantly bargaining, 'When we've finished with the school fair/getting the grass cut as per the infringement notice/sorting an automatic car for the GOM to pass his test in/dealing with the anti-discrimination commission, then I'll be able to focus on writing.' Gah, it's just not happening - though I have been working on plot elements and structure at least. I'm conceding defeat on the word count, though. There is always next year. Though it galls me.
#10 ~ The lack of chocolate and sweet wine in this house*.
Linking up with Diary of a SAHM for I Blog on Tuesday.
* This blogger is not too proud to accept donations of chocolate and sweet wine... Anyone?