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Five Sentence Fiction: Secrets...




What it’s all about: Five Sentence Fiction is about packing a powerful punch in a tiny fist. Each week I will post a one word inspiration, then anyone wishing to participate will write a five sentence story based on the prompt word. The word does not have to appear in your five sentences, just use it for direction.

This week’s inspiration word is: SECRETS



1. It sat in the dark watching her and waiting.


2. Alice stacked the dinner dishes ready for washing after she'd put Benny to bed; a faint smile rested on her lips.


3. Despite being widowed before her son was born and having to raise him on her own in a foreign country, Alice had always managed to find the beauty in life.


4. It sat in the dark simmering and seething, It longed to spring forth and unleash its mighty capacity for despair and devastation, but the time was not right yet.


5. It quivered in anticipation of wiping the smile from her lips.

Comments

Kebeni said…
this is what depression feels like for me
Sif said…
I concur. A dark malevolent thing lurking in the shadows. No wonder it's called the black dog - same sort of imagery.
Sarah Mac said…
Depression is a hateful thing lurking in the background waiting to strike.

You captured this beautifully Sif as ever.

Each week I say I'm going to join in with this but so far I haven't managed it.

Maybe next week ;)
claire said…
That was wonderful. Every sentence was creepy, and I could just feel that creature readying itself to pounce on that poor women. Great job!
Lillie McFerrin said…
You've captured this perfectly! I know that feeling well, and can never describe it just right. Thank you for your words! Awesome job!!!
Jo-Anne said…
wonderfully dark rich imagery!
Great writing as always, Sif. I first thought it might be a scary, futuristic, monstery piece, however, yes, get that this is the black beast of depression.
I find it interesting that some people who have been touched by this awful condition experience it as something external that sets upon them, others feel it as an internal, personal failing. Interested to hear what others think
Kate
Sif said…
Kate, for me it feels external because (believe it or not) when not depressed, I'm a very optimistic person, but when depressed I feel like something is covering and suffocating my optimism. i can often seeing for I am lucky and how much good there is in my life but that knowledge isn't able to blossom into a feeling of contentment due a heavy black fog which supresses it. I often feeling as if I'm actively fighting to have a positive feeling - so I feel as if I'm battling something outside of myself that is threatening to smother me. Sometimes it feels like I'll never feel happy again - despite the face I put on for others.
Thanks Sif,
Your description really helps me to understand how it feels - I wish for you that it doesn't visit very often!
kate
B said…
This is great... I agree with what you have said about depression feeling like wrestling something outside of yourself. I love how people got to that conclusion without you actually writing it. The more writers I meet the more I realise that we all struggle to keep our black dogs on a leash. I wonder if this is why we can write about so many things - we experience a full range of emotion on a regular basis!

I think I would have got the feeling of your piece better if your sentences were all as paragraphs - not a numbered list... I had to read it a few times to really 'get' what you were trying to say....
Sif said…
Thanks guys :)

B the reason I number the sentences is to show that there are only five of them. Some of the others don't number their sentences - I think it depends on which link up you're linking up with (on some five sentence link ups numbering is expected, on others it isn't). I'm happy to write without the numbers though if others don't mind because they certainly do break up the flow of the pieces.

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