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10 Things Tuesday: 10 ways to deal with anger that don't involve alcohol and a bullet...

This post is inspired by a friend's tweet which reminded me that I've tried many ways to relieve anger that didn't involve my first preference of just socking someone in the chops...

Yes, I've had a lot of anger in my life. It's hard, you know, when people around you can't see the brilliance of your insights or aren't as motivated to act as you are. All sorts of things make me angry:

  • the rubbish from the kids uniform pockets being deposited on a shelf in the laundry when you cannot leave the laundry without passing the rubbish bin, grrrr!
  • victimhood - you know the people who go out of their way to be victims so they can feel bad when it all reality their lives are pretty spectacular compared to so many other people!
  • inaction when action is desperately needed - sitting on rail tracks watching a train bear down on you and praying God will just stop the train, yeah that!
  • Tony Abbott

So, I've tried many things to relieve my own symptoms of anger, here are some more and less effective methods...

  1. Taking a hot, hot, hot shower - somehow it cools my temper. It's been shown that a lot of electronic devices emit positive ions which can cause people to feel stressed because of their frenetic energy. We live in a world surrounded by this frenetic energy and so it's not at all surprising a lot of people feel a lot of anxiety, stress and anger in their daily lives. The solution is to balance the positive ions with negative ions, which come from moving water and moving air, amongst other things. At the end of a stressful day, a shower can be very cleansing and relaxing, as can walking in the rain or standing in a gusty wind...
  2. Screaming into a pillow, though you might feel like a tool the first dozen times you do this, it actually does work... The pillow is essential, you don't want to frighten your kids or neighbours, okay!
  3. Laughing... What makes you laugh? Seek it out and feel those relaxing hormones drizzle into your brain... You Tube is quite good if you look up comedy acts. I like Billy Connelly, but someone else might work for you...
  4. Singing. It is said you can't sing and stay mad. Okay, possibly if you're singing along to some thrash metal, you might be able to stay mad, but anything remotely melodious should work. Just don't sing those sad songs because sadness is a close cousin of anger and you don't need that when you're angry.
  5. Get out into natural. This is the same principal as getting under a shower, but without risking getting depressed when you realise you need to clean the bathroom - again! Pick your favourite spot - for me it's by the water - crashing waves always soothe my troubled mind. I would list this one first except that it can be very inconvenient to just wander off to a hillside or the beach when you're in the middle of the witching hour and the kids are going spare and someone on the net or the television or even in your face is making you stabby! Got to keep it real, so nature comes in at number five.
  6. Get physical! Go for a walk, if you can't do that turn on some loud music and dance. Wash a floor - okay, okay, not everyone's thing, but you get my drift right. Release the tension in your muscles and who doesn't feel better in a clean space, right? 
  7. Go look in the mirror and do facial stretches. Loosening facial muscles is directly linked with releasing feel good hormones in the brain, also, you'll look like a complete eedjit and that may cause you to laugh which is point number 3...
  8. Write it out. I did this for years. Every night I would write out all the stuff on my mind, all the things that made me angry for the most part - I have over 30 volumes of vitriol! Handwriting is more physical that typing, so use a pen and an actual book or some paper. If you don't want to keep all your angry thoughts, burn them afterwards... Gazing into a fire can be very relaxing, pyromaniacs swear by it...
  9. Meditate, practice the art of letting go. I say this, but I'm completely hopeless at doing this myself. Still, it might work for you and it's worth a try at least...
  10. If you really have to punch something, then punch something - a cushion, a punching bag, a mattress. It might actually be just what you need...



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