Skip to main content

At a loose end...

I'm at a loose end, and I'm really not good at it.

This is why I wouldn't make a good buddhist or meditator. I'm far to restless and these four competing channels of thought in my head are so noisy and distracting and frustrating - and right now they're all clambering for something to work on, to nut out, to pull apart and reassemble and examine and theorise  about.

Having submitted my application and with no other 'project' to occupy my mental spaces, I'm feeling agitated and hungry for stimulation.

The internet doesn't it do it for me - yes, it's entertaining but mostly it's just a time suck, filling my head with superficiality and pureed ideas that are more palatable to the masses - and no one had better suggest housework, because I'd probably not be able to resist the urge to scratch your eyes out.

I've been biting hooks, which is no good.

Not actual hooks, just the kind of hooks you find on forums and Facebook. You know, someone makes a statement and it's so preposterous you can feel your muscles coil into jump mode and you're more or less powerless to fight the urge to pounce. Yeah, that.

Statements like suggesting people who choose not to vaccinate their kids are not fulfilling their obligation to society. (because obligations are, you know, only ever one way, right?)

Or suggesting that Michelle Obama has let down feminists by saying she views her highest priority to be her role as a mother. (because Michelle Obama can only be a proper feminist if she downplays her role as a mother and is embarrassed by that role)

I know my views aren't popular, neither was Pythagoras' view that the earth was, in fact, spherical rather than flat. It took hundreds of years for that theory to be widely accepted, too, but the evidence was all around.

Please follow this link, the blog post it takes you to is quite fascinating!

Even if I'm wrong - and I may be - it's only my opinion, right?

I should probably just keep my opinions to myself, they aren't winning my any friends. The thing about that is, what if I'm actually right - as inconceivable as that might be to many - shouldn't I at least put the ideas out there for consideration (surely *someone* isn't just fobbing me off as a nut)?

The truth is, if I was not at a loose end, I'd probably be too busy to bite hooks. That would probably be best for everyone, too, because I'd feel a lot calmer and everyone else could just get along agreeing amongst themselves without my dubious contributions.

Argh! Being at a loose end is torture!


Popular posts from this blog

12 Things Happy People Do Differently - a self-reflection...

A few days ago a Facebook friend posted the above poster on her wall. I believe she got these points from this blog which she enjoys reading, and the bloggers on the Marc and Angel Hack Life blog derived their discussion of these points from this book, available on Amazon - you're welcome! I have to admit, I haven't read the blog or the book I've just mentioned but wanted my readers to have access to the sources of the poster for their own reflective purposes.
The New Year will be upon us in but a few days and I thought this a great opportunity to do a little personal assessment on how I'm playing the happy game. I'm often not very happy at all - I don't need to be happy all the time, let me just say that up front - I personally believe that life is a balancing act and those who seek euphoria often will also often feel desolation because in all things there must be balance. The great riches of the few on this planet come at the personal cost of the many as is …

The symbolism of elephants...

Just recently I've been seeing and noticing elephants everywhere!

A few weeks ago I saw the Samsung Elephant Ad, and watching that led me to watching a video with an elephant painting (seriously, you have to watch it to believe it!).

Then last night the boys told me they were having a free dress day at school to raise money for 'Mali the Elephant' - who turned out to be a paper maché statue which the children will paint and then show around the council before it comes back to the school to stand outside the performing arts room.

Then this morning I followed a link from Twitter to Toushka Lee's blog and read this post about an elephant orphanage in Sri Lanka.

This morning the Grumpy Old Man did another driving test and unfortunately didn't pass. We've booked his next test and are looking forward to that now. About ten minutes before he walked in the door I saw this poster on Facebook...

At the time, I didn't know if the Grumpy Old Man had been successful or …

Do you have low self-esteem?

I don't.

I used to think I did, but having met several people who really do have low self-esteem, I've now come to realise I actually have low confidence (and note I don't say low self-confidence, but more on that later), and that is a different breed of animal all together.

I was having a chat with a friend the other day about people who constantly put themselves down. If you are a participant in social media you might be aware of this kind of person. Everyone is smarter than them, prettier than them, more motivated, better organised, or has greater talent than them. It goes further, some of these people are not at all opposed to running themselves down to others with comments like, 'I'm so fat' (and not in a proud, fat acceptance way, but in a negative, self-loathing kind of way), or 'I'm stupid' or 'I'm ugly'.

Some people are just fishing for compliments, of course, but the ones who persist; the ones who simply cannot take a complimen…