September 25, 2012

Men!

This catch cry irritates me.

Yes, it's a well established fact that I am rather easily irritated. All the same, whenever I see someone - and by someone I mean women - started a vent with 'Men!', I immediately wonder what element of womanhood this woman is tapping into.

You see, I'm married to a man and I'm raising four men. In our society men are believed to have the lion share of the power. Ironically - if you believe television shows and advertising - they are also believed to be rather useless. They are believed to be low-brow. They are believed to be at the mercy of their impulses; boys will be boys, men will be men, etcetera. Men are believed to be lazy and selfish and base.

When a woman says, 'Men!', other women know this is short for, 'Just wait until you hear what my man has said or done now!' What ensues will often be quite frustrating. It'll be a story of a man who has been selfish or thoughtless or childish, or mean. Men can be all of these things. My man has been all of these things. It is frustrating because the man has been less than he should have been and yet, should that be extrapolated to all men???

Here's the rub.

Women can be all of these things, and men doubtlessly share these same kinds of stories with their friends about the women in their lives.

Only that is called misogyny.

If a man cries, 'Women!' it is misogyny. He hates women. He is about to degrade all women because one woman has hurt him.

When a woman cries, 'Men!' What is is? Is it labelled anything other than frustration or hurt? What is the female counterpart of misogyny? I'll look it up because, honestly, the word does not come to mind.

Oh, right, it's misandry - actually, I do know that word, it just slipped my mind because, well, you hardly ever hear it. So, the female counterpart of a misogynist is a misandrist. I doubt very much any of my friends are misandrists. Likewise, I doubt many men are truly misogynists.

So, when women cry, 'Men!' Do you believe they are being misandrist? When men cry, 'Women!' are they being misogynist? Is it fair to lump all men or all women in with the poor behaviour of one, on a particular occasion? Either we stop calling men misogynists for lumping us into one group, or we stop acting in ways, that if we saw men doing the same, we'd call them misogynists.

source

We, humans that is, need to treat each other with the respect we each expect to be treated with. That means if you don't want men to lump all women into one group and hate on them, then you must also not do that about men.

This post was brought to you by the emotion irritation and the state continuous.

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