Was in the car this morning morning, dragging my sorry self off to Uni to pick up my work to do from home, and was listening to radio national (I think) when life matters (again, I think, I was totally hopped up on painkillers and cold medication and barrocca) came on with the discussion of 'post-partum bodies' and the increasing need women have for plastic surgery to get rid of post baby jelly belly, stretch marks and droopy boobs.
I didn't hear the rest of the show because as soon as I heard the intro I felt compelled to kick the dash board of the car into a million tiny bits of plastic, so instead I calmly, but quickly, changed the radio channel to some hideous 'sound scape' of so-called 'music'...
How have women become so very obsessed with their bodies?
Oh, I know, its all men's fault, they stop desiring us when we get fat, or flabby or droopy...
No they don't. Go sit in any shopping centre in the world and analyse the couples, they come in all shapes and sizes, both men and women, and there are most definitely men with women who are fat, flabby and droopy - in fact, a considerable proportion of men are just as fat, flabby and droopy - seriously!
So, why are we so obsessed? Why are there entire sites dedicated to women propping each other up about how they are 'still beautiful' with their postpartum dodgy bits.
Why are there other women who won't have vaginal births or breastfeed for fear of making their bodies ugly (pssst, just so you know, it's pregnancy that causes skin elasticity to fade, not vaginal birth or breastfeeding)?
Why do we even ask men if they still desire us?
Why do we give them the option of saying no???
Are women stupid?
I don't get it.
I'll tell you this much, I think our society has made us all a tad too vain.
I mean really, we are all caught up in the beauty game one way or another, aren't we? Either we are fighting tooth and nail to stay conventionally beautiful (convention being an ass because no one looks like the ideal, no one!). Or we are desperately trying to convince ourselves and everyone who will listen that we are beautiful despite our flab, our stretch marks, our cellulite.
In other words, whichever side of playing field we're on, we're still giving the very concept of 'undesirable' air to breathe.
Let's just STOP.
Let's never mention it again!
Let's just live our lives and love and lust and get just get on with all the actual important stuff. Let's do away with mirrors - not because we can't stand to see our own reflection but because what we see is actually meaningless. It means nothing.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, that is why all shapes and sizes of couples exist. They haven't 'settled'. They have found beauty and love - and you can't tell them they're wrong, because they are not.