Foreboding...

July is nearly done and usually at this time of year I am starting to look forward to the return of warmth and sunlight, but this year I have a terrible sense of foreboding. The quiet before the storm is when the air is heaviest with tension and electricity, and right now its charge is at its peak.

I have been invited to present at the Australasian Association of Writing Programs conference in Wellington at the end of November, and I am to submit a paper to be peer reviewed by the end of September. The paper will discuss things I wrote leading up to my colloquium, though I need to revisit the scholarly sources with a little more depth and perception of difference, I think. So, the paper will be challenging but probably not as challenging as what will come next.

You see, we have the makings of a perfect storm in November.

I will be preparing the talk, and that will be somewhat nerve-wracking. Primarily because I will not know the venue, and I am not well versed in actually using programs such as Prezi or Powerpoint. I mean, I can make a presentation in these, but setting this up at a venue and knowing how to work my way back and forth through slides is a whole other matter.

So, I'm bound to feel quite nervous in November.

As well as this, the house will officially move into the hands of the new owners in October. They told us in May they would be giving us notice to vacate by February, but possibly earlier, and so some time in November, I expect we will be looking for new digs, and possibly also moving.

Add to this the fact that Ari turns six at the end of October and therefore, the Grumpy Old Man will be moved from the parenting payment partnered to NewStart and will be expected to lodge 10 job applications a week, suddenly, he will be a lot more busy, and we will be living on less.

I have been trying not to think about any of this, but now that I have the invitation to present at the conference it is all becoming quite real and close.

I had hoped to be offered tutoring work after my colloquium, but we're in week three of the trimester and so far, no offer has been forth-coming. I suspect these things are arranged well before the beginning of trimester and therefore before I was confirmed. So, I'm guessing I will not be offered work now until November.

No work for either the Grumpy Old Man or myself will make looking for a new rental very challenging. We were so very lucky to secure this place easily, but that isn't like to happen again. MIL is not showing any signs of wanting to sell up and move in with us, even though she relies on us more and more for every month that passes, and her knees are giving her a lot of trouble these days (she doesn't walk, so much as shuffle, now).

I'm worried about not coping.

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