Skip to main content

Living in fear is not living...




I came across this Henry Miller quote today and it really spoke to me. I know too many people who live in fear. They fear being laughed at, or they fear failure, or they fear pressure, some even fear boredom. So many people who abdicate all responsibility for their lives. It is always someone else's fault they are miserable and fearful. They feel the world is out to get them, and they run and hide in fear. It's the fight or flight response - each is a form of survive, but one leads to a life in a dark, dark cave. The other may lead to embarrassment, sadness, or even nothing much and these things may feel akin to a sort of death, but it's a death with your eyes open and the sun on your face.

Living in fear is no life at all.

I suffer from anxiety, I am medicated for it, but I still live with it. Still, I fight the fear anxiety brings tooth and nail, just because Fuck Living in Fear.

When I fear something - loneliness, confrontation, rejection - I run at it. I throw myself at it. Otherwise, it will follow me forever, and really, who wants that?

I very much have a fight, not flight, reaction.

Some people view this trait in me as fierce and assertive, some people view it as aggressive, some people view it as stupid. I am not affected by these views, one way or another - without my drive to fight, I'd be dead. Not figuratively dead, but actually dead. In fact, I came very close to being dead because I once let anxiety get the better of me.

Luckily, I encountered a person who was as fierce as I am now. She told me to get up and get out of the situation that was killing me. She saw my fear and said what she had to say anyway. I could have crumpled at the sound of her words, but instead they gave me the strength to act in spite of my fear and from that I learned to run headlong at my fears because what was the worst that could happen? I could die? Maybe, but a life in fear is death

I have nothing to lose from facing my fears and fighting them tooth and nail. I have a life of living to lose if I cower in fear.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

12 Things Happy People Do Differently - a self-reflection...

A few days ago a Facebook friend posted the above poster on her wall. I believe she got these points from this blog which she enjoys reading, and the bloggers on the Marc and Angel Hack Life blog derived their discussion of these points from this book, available on Amazon - you're welcome! I have to admit, I haven't read the blog or the book I've just mentioned but wanted my readers to have access to the sources of the poster for their own reflective purposes.
The New Year will be upon us in but a few days and I thought this a great opportunity to do a little personal assessment on how I'm playing the happy game. I'm often not very happy at all - I don't need to be happy all the time, let me just say that up front - I personally believe that life is a balancing act and those who seek euphoria often will also often feel desolation because in all things there must be balance. The great riches of the few on this planet come at the personal cost of the many as is …

The symbolism of elephants...

Just recently I've been seeing and noticing elephants everywhere!

A few weeks ago I saw the Samsung Elephant Ad, and watching that led me to watching a video with an elephant painting (seriously, you have to watch it to believe it!).

Then last night the boys told me they were having a free dress day at school to raise money for 'Mali the Elephant' - who turned out to be a paper maché statue which the children will paint and then show around the council before it comes back to the school to stand outside the performing arts room.

Then this morning I followed a link from Twitter to Toushka Lee's blog and read this post about an elephant orphanage in Sri Lanka.

This morning the Grumpy Old Man did another driving test and unfortunately didn't pass. We've booked his next test and are looking forward to that now. About ten minutes before he walked in the door I saw this poster on Facebook...


At the time, I didn't know if the Grumpy Old Man had been successful or …

Do you have low self-esteem?

I don't.

I used to think I did, but having met several people who really do have low self-esteem, I've now come to realise I actually have low confidence (and note I don't say low self-confidence, but more on that later), and that is a different breed of animal all together.

I was having a chat with a friend the other day about people who constantly put themselves down. If you are a participant in social media you might be aware of this kind of person. Everyone is smarter than them, prettier than them, more motivated, better organised, or has greater talent than them. It goes further, some of these people are not at all opposed to running themselves down to others with comments like, 'I'm so fat' (and not in a proud, fat acceptance way, but in a negative, self-loathing kind of way), or 'I'm stupid' or 'I'm ugly'.

Some people are just fishing for compliments, of course, but the ones who persist; the ones who simply cannot take a complimen…