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I'm not going to get that paper in...

The deadline for the paper I was going to submit, the one I spent hundreds of dollars going to Adelaide to present just so I'd be eligible to submit it - yeah, that one - I woke up this morning (at 3.50am) and realised I'm not going to get it done. I haven't started on it and there are two and bit weeks left until it's due. The thing that bothers me about this is that I'm not bothered about it. Does this mean I'm letting go of the research thing? Another thing I'm not bothered about is my book. I should be more interested in how it's going, I know the publishers are promoting it, but I have absolutely no idea what's happening with it. I haven't done any work on the next book either.

What does this mean?

Did I just waste 23 years of my life striving to write, to research, to be published to just have my passion for it fade away? Maybe I burned out? Maybe not completely, I'm still writing this blog.

At work at the moment my focus has shifted to advocacy for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander vision issues. This, I don't know, area of work, area of research, area of advocacy, it's bigger than I ever expected. For one thing I went to a state eye health committee meeting with a dozen or so health and government officials yesterday - more of whom I expected I knew - and yesterday morning while researching some of the organisations and departments that would be represented, I discovered there will be a conference on relevant topics in March. I have been personally invited to attend the conference by one of the organisers, ha! This promises to be an enlightening time. I would like to see an ATSI liaison position created for Vision Australia. That position would have to be for applicants identifying as ATSI.

Some consultation with a couple of members of the committee raised the issue that our pamphlet for ATSI customers may be off-putting to ATSI people connecting with VA due to the colour scheme. This is the sort of thing we need to be aware of.

I have a meeting with my general manager and the communications director next week in relation to my attendance at this meeting yesterday (they didn't know I was going because I'd been in conversation with the chair of the committee - by coincidence - and had been personally invited to attend by him), I'll mention the pamphlet then. The manager of strategic partnership (and something something), usually goes apparently, and yesterday the general manager was scheduled to go. As it turned out neither of those people was able to make it, so luckily, I was there - timing and location, people.

So, yeah, the research and writing seems to have faded into the background 

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